culture, politics, commentary, criticism

Friday, December 22, 2006
The Third Annual White House Christmas Special! Because I am too lazy to think up something new, it must be time for a clip reel.

Here are some highlights from a couple of the most widely underappreciated posts in Skimbleland, starting with
The Second Annual White House Christmas Special. Please feel free to sing along...

Joy to the World: Evolution Edition

Sung by the Secular Humanism Christmas Holiday Chorale
to the tune of "Joy to the World"

Joy to the world,
This duck is lame.
Let Darwin do his thing!
Let every state
Know where to place the blame,
And heav’n and nature sing,
And heav’n and nature sing,
And heav’n and nature sing!

And from The First Annnual White House Christmas Special...

Spider Hole

Sung with a Texas twang by George W Bush
to the tune of "Jingle Bells"

Dashing to Iraq
With a stopoff in Kuwait
Overspend a lot
Catch the guy I hate
Cheney makes a face
Loves inflicting pain
‘Cause everything they’re losing there
Is Halliburton’s gain!

Oh, spider hole, spider hole,
Shock and awe and bomb
Oh what fun it is to try
To neutralize Saddam!
Silo nukes, Baathist gooks,
Nothing there? My bad!
Oh what fun to fry the guy
Who tried to kill my dad!

Cue global booing... wait... NOW!

Greatest Hits · Alternatives to First Command Financial Planning · First Command, last resort, Part 3 · Part 2 · Part 1 · Stealing $50K from a widow: Wells Real Estate · Leo Wells, REITs and divine wealth · Sex-crazed Red State teenagers · What I hate: a manifesto · Spawn of Darleen Druyun · All-American high school sex party · Why is Ken Lay smiling? · Poppy's Enron birthday party · The Saudi money laundry and the president's uncle · The sentence of Enron's John Forney · The holiness of Neil Bush's marriage · The Silence of Cheney: a poem · South Park Christians · Capitalist against Bush: Warren Buffett · Fastow childen vs. Enron children · Give your prescription money to your old boss · Neil Bush, hard-working matchmaker · Republicans against fetuses and pregnant women · Emboldened Ken Lay · Faith-based jails · Please die for me so I can skip your funeral · A brief illustrated history of the Republican Party · Nancy Victory · Soldiers become accountants · Beware the Merrill Lynch mob · Darleen Druyun's $5.7 billion surprise · First responder funding · Hoovering the country · First Command fifty percent load · Ken Lay and the Atkins diet · Halliburton WMD · Leave no CEO behind · August in Crawford · Elaine Pagels · Profitable slave labor at Halliburton · Tom Hanks + Mujahideen · Sharon & Neilsie Bush · One weekend a month, or eternity · Is the US pumping Iraqi oil to Kuwait? · Cheney's war · Seth Glickenhaus: Capitalist against Bush · Martha's blow job · Mark Belnick: Tyco Catholic nut · Cheney's deferred Halliburton compensation · Jeb sucks sugar cane · Poindexter & LifeLog · American Family Association panic · Riley Bechtel and the crony economy · The Book of Sharon (Bush) · The Art of Enron · Plunder convention · Waiting in Kuwait: Jay Garner · What's an Army private worth? · Barbara Bodine, Queen of Baghdad · Sneaky bastards at Halliburton · Golf course and barbecue military strategy · Enron at large · Recent astroturf · Cracker Chic 2 · No business like war business · Big Brother · Martha Stewart vs. Thomas White · Roger Kimball, disappointed Republican poetry fan · Cheney, Lay, Afghanistan · Terry Lynn Barton, crimes of burning · Feasting at the Cheney trough · Who would Jesus indict? · Return of the Carlyle Group · Duct tape is for little people · GOP and bad medicine · Sears Tower vs Mt Rushmore · Scared Christians · Crooked playing field · John O'Neill: The man who knew · Back to the top

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