culture, politics, commentary, criticism

Monday, October 09, 2006
Emission accomplished. We learned over the weekend that Mark Foley waited until at least one former page was
21 years old until he started having man-on-boyman sex with him. That clears up the question of whether the cybersecurity watchdog's mission was ever accomplished — his personal mission, that is. The answer is yes, yes, God, yes!

Meanwhile, the other "Mission Accomplished" guy has of course achieved his personal mission. Like Foley, Bush has gotten his rocks off over his own fetish: removing Saddam Hussein from power. And once again we see that what the GOP politician says his mission is, and what his mission actually is, are two very different things. He says he wants to spread freedom and democracy and fight terrorism, but what he really wants is to act out a family vendetta and show up his wimp daddy.

These two men — Foley and Bush — are cut from the same cloth. And today, this very day on which we learn of North Korea's entry into the Nuclear Club, represents the complete melding of Foley-Bush as emblematic of modern Republicans. They pretend to protect our children, or our nation, and simply refuse to do it. They pretend to be Christian. They pretend to have compassion. They pretend to strategize about wars and economies and disaster preparedness.

The GOP is the party of saying one thing, and doing its opposite. That's why Foley is still relevant: he is the patron saint, the living symbol, of the complete and utter failure of the Republican Party.

Greatest Hits · Alternatives to First Command Financial Planning · First Command, last resort, Part 3 · Part 2 · Part 1 · Stealing $50K from a widow: Wells Real Estate · Leo Wells, REITs and divine wealth · Sex-crazed Red State teenagers · What I hate: a manifesto · Spawn of Darleen Druyun · All-American high school sex party · Why is Ken Lay smiling? · Poppy's Enron birthday party · The Saudi money laundry and the president's uncle · The sentence of Enron's John Forney · The holiness of Neil Bush's marriage · The Silence of Cheney: a poem · South Park Christians · Capitalist against Bush: Warren Buffett · Fastow childen vs. Enron children · Give your prescription money to your old boss · Neil Bush, hard-working matchmaker · Republicans against fetuses and pregnant women · Emboldened Ken Lay · Faith-based jails · Please die for me so I can skip your funeral · A brief illustrated history of the Republican Party · Nancy Victory · Soldiers become accountants · Beware the Merrill Lynch mob · Darleen Druyun's $5.7 billion surprise · First responder funding · Hoovering the country · First Command fifty percent load · Ken Lay and the Atkins diet · Halliburton WMD · Leave no CEO behind · August in Crawford · Elaine Pagels · Profitable slave labor at Halliburton · Tom Hanks + Mujahideen · Sharon & Neilsie Bush · One weekend a month, or eternity · Is the US pumping Iraqi oil to Kuwait? · Cheney's war · Seth Glickenhaus: Capitalist against Bush · Martha's blow job · Mark Belnick: Tyco Catholic nut · Cheney's deferred Halliburton compensation · Jeb sucks sugar cane · Poindexter & LifeLog · American Family Association panic · Riley Bechtel and the crony economy · The Book of Sharon (Bush) · The Art of Enron · Plunder convention · Waiting in Kuwait: Jay Garner · What's an Army private worth? · Barbara Bodine, Queen of Baghdad · Sneaky bastards at Halliburton · Golf course and barbecue military strategy · Enron at large · Recent astroturf · Cracker Chic 2 · No business like war business · Big Brother · Martha Stewart vs. Thomas White · Roger Kimball, disappointed Republican poetry fan · Cheney, Lay, Afghanistan · Terry Lynn Barton, crimes of burning · Feasting at the Cheney trough · Who would Jesus indict? · Return of the Carlyle Group · Duct tape is for little people · GOP and bad medicine · Sears Tower vs Mt Rushmore · Scared Christians · Crooked playing field · John O'Neill: The man who knew · Back to the top

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