culture, politics, commentary, criticism

Thursday, July 13, 2006
Ken Lay, messiah. Apparently Ken Lay was only generous to people when they were
standing right next to him:
Some with no social or business connection also paid their respects [at his memorial]. Geraldine Zillions said she came to know Lay a year ago when she was at Bering's, buying $80 worth of gardening equipment. When she realized she had left her wallet at home, Lay, who was in line behind her, paid for her purchase and refused to let her reimburse him.

Carpenter Jon Bothager, who worked on one of the Lays' River Oaks homes, tearfully recalled their generosity: His son was a top graduate of Stratford High School but could not get scholarship money. When he asked how he might find a way to get his son into the University of Texas, the Lays paid his tuition until Enron fell apart.
Behold the Houstonian God, Ken Lay. Geraldine Zillions [!] got to touch the hem of His garment, and received the celestial gift of gardening equipment &mdash procured with earthly gold pieces from Enron employees' 401(k) plan, verily.

Jon Bothager built Lay's humble River Oaks manger and polished His holy halo, and lo, Jon's child receives the fullness of the wisdom of the University of Texas. Such magnanimity! Such holy mercy! Such divine kindness!

As heaven opens its pearly gates to receive Him, let us sing Lay's praises! How mighty is His bounty! How brilliant His sacred visage! How lowly and pitiful the mere mortals who desire but a crust of bread from his holy purse!

Greatest Hits · Alternatives to First Command Financial Planning · First Command, last resort, Part 3 · Part 2 · Part 1 · Stealing $50K from a widow: Wells Real Estate · Leo Wells, REITs and divine wealth · Sex-crazed Red State teenagers · What I hate: a manifesto · Spawn of Darleen Druyun · All-American high school sex party · Why is Ken Lay smiling? · Poppy's Enron birthday party · The Saudi money laundry and the president's uncle · The sentence of Enron's John Forney · The holiness of Neil Bush's marriage · The Silence of Cheney: a poem · South Park Christians · Capitalist against Bush: Warren Buffett · Fastow childen vs. Enron children · Give your prescription money to your old boss · Neil Bush, hard-working matchmaker · Republicans against fetuses and pregnant women · Emboldened Ken Lay · Faith-based jails · Please die for me so I can skip your funeral · A brief illustrated history of the Republican Party · Nancy Victory · Soldiers become accountants · Beware the Merrill Lynch mob · Darleen Druyun's $5.7 billion surprise · First responder funding · Hoovering the country · First Command fifty percent load · Ken Lay and the Atkins diet · Halliburton WMD · Leave no CEO behind · August in Crawford · Elaine Pagels · Profitable slave labor at Halliburton · Tom Hanks + Mujahideen · Sharon & Neilsie Bush · One weekend a month, or eternity · Is the US pumping Iraqi oil to Kuwait? · Cheney's war · Seth Glickenhaus: Capitalist against Bush · Martha's blow job · Mark Belnick: Tyco Catholic nut · Cheney's deferred Halliburton compensation · Jeb sucks sugar cane · Poindexter & LifeLog · American Family Association panic · Riley Bechtel and the crony economy · The Book of Sharon (Bush) · The Art of Enron · Plunder convention · Waiting in Kuwait: Jay Garner · What's an Army private worth? · Barbara Bodine, Queen of Baghdad · Sneaky bastards at Halliburton · Golf course and barbecue military strategy · Enron at large · Recent astroturf · Cracker Chic 2 · No business like war business · Big Brother · Martha Stewart vs. Thomas White · Roger Kimball, disappointed Republican poetry fan · Cheney, Lay, Afghanistan · Terry Lynn Barton, crimes of burning · Feasting at the Cheney trough · Who would Jesus indict? · Return of the Carlyle Group · Duct tape is for little people · GOP and bad medicine · Sears Tower vs Mt Rushmore · Scared Christians · Crooked playing field · John O'Neill: The man who knew · Back to the top

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