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Be Gone Demons! Without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, Saddam's novel (Chicago Sun-Times):

Saddam Hussein spent the final weeks before the war writing a novel predicting that he would lead an underground resistance movement to victory over the Americans, rather than planning the defense of his regime.

As the war began and Saddam went into hiding 40,000 copies of Be Gone Demons! were rolling off the presses.

Most were destroyed by bombing and looting but the Daily Telegraph has obtained one of the few remaining copies of the novel -- a historical epic that reveals both Saddam's increasing detachment from the world and his inflated sense of self.

The narrative meanders through the history of Iraq and is filled with paranoid invectives against the Jews, who delight in inciting troubles between Muslim nations and encouraging the Romans -- a synonym for the Americans -- to attack Iraq.

Cheney's novel (begun while he was in hiding following 9-11-01): Be Gone Democrats!

Karl Rove's novel: Be Gone Dean!

Texas's novel: Be Gone Dildos!

Ashcroft's novel: Be Gone Doobie!

Scalia's novel: Be Gone Democracy!

Bush, incapable of giving even a credible interview (see "what's the difference?" on page 2 of his sitdown with Diane Sawyer), isn't writing a novel, but reading one: Go Dog Go!

Link via MobyLives, 12/17/03.

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