culture, politics, commentary, criticism

Tuesday, February 11, 2003
Via
Notes on the Atrocities comes the very spooky Presidential Prayer Team, a bunch of people convinced that they can communicate with worlds other than the one that our president is actively ruining.

Anecdotal evidence for the "power" of prayer abounds:
Accident victim credits prayer with saving his life after being thrown 25 feet into the air.

An 18-year-old driver credits God with answering his desperate prayers for survival. "God was definitely in control," said Joe R. Thompson, III after he was rescued.

Thompson was driving in Kansas City, Missouri on Monday, January 27 when he lost control of his vehicle. He was thrown 25 feet into the air, bounced off several power lines and fell onto what he believes was a heavy telephone line. When one of his legs caught on the wire, he quickly wrapped his other leg around it and held on.

"I just kept saying a prayer over and over," he said. Police report that Thompson was "bear-hugging" the wires when they arrived. He was also in constant communication with his father while the crew worked to turn off power in order to complete the rescue. His father asked him how long he would be able to hold on, and Joe reported, "I can hold on as long as it takes." Thompson dangled from the wires for 20 minutes before he was brought safely to the ground.
Who can argue with evidence as compelling as this?

If God is "definitely in control," as Joe just informed us, does this mean we can finally blame God for the disintegration of the Columbia space shuttle? 9/11? Vietnam? The Holocaust? Hiroshima? The Inquisition?

The deaths of millions of innocent victims can now be attributed to the feebleness of their efforts at effective, politically motivated prayer. We must kneel and give thanks to American Christians for showing nonbelievers the way to completely shut down rational thought and obey our unelected masters.
.



Greatest Hits · Alternatives to First Command Financial Planning · First Command, last resort, Part 3 · Part 2 · Part 1 · Stealing $50K from a widow: Wells Real Estate · Leo Wells, REITs and divine wealth · Sex-crazed Red State teenagers · What I hate: a manifesto · Spawn of Darleen Druyun · All-American high school sex party · Why is Ken Lay smiling? · Poppy's Enron birthday party · The Saudi money laundry and the president's uncle · The sentence of Enron's John Forney · The holiness of Neil Bush's marriage · The Silence of Cheney: a poem · South Park Christians · Capitalist against Bush: Warren Buffett · Fastow childen vs. Enron children · Give your prescription money to your old boss · Neil Bush, hard-working matchmaker · Republicans against fetuses and pregnant women · Emboldened Ken Lay · Faith-based jails · Please die for me so I can skip your funeral · A brief illustrated history of the Republican Party · Nancy Victory · Soldiers become accountants · Beware the Merrill Lynch mob · Darleen Druyun's $5.7 billion surprise · First responder funding · Hoovering the country · First Command fifty percent load · Ken Lay and the Atkins diet · Halliburton WMD · Leave no CEO behind · August in Crawford · Elaine Pagels · Profitable slave labor at Halliburton · Tom Hanks + Mujahideen · Sharon & Neilsie Bush · One weekend a month, or eternity · Is the US pumping Iraqi oil to Kuwait? · Cheney's war · Seth Glickenhaus: Capitalist against Bush · Martha's blow job · Mark Belnick: Tyco Catholic nut · Cheney's deferred Halliburton compensation · Jeb sucks sugar cane · Poindexter & LifeLog · American Family Association panic · Riley Bechtel and the crony economy · The Book of Sharon (Bush) · The Art of Enron · Plunder convention · Waiting in Kuwait: Jay Garner · What's an Army private worth? · Barbara Bodine, Queen of Baghdad · Sneaky bastards at Halliburton · Golf course and barbecue military strategy · Enron at large · Recent astroturf · Cracker Chic 2 · No business like war business · Big Brother · Martha Stewart vs. Thomas White · Roger Kimball, disappointed Republican poetry fan · Cheney, Lay, Afghanistan · Terry Lynn Barton, crimes of burning · Feasting at the Cheney trough · Who would Jesus indict? · Return of the Carlyle Group · Duct tape is for little people · GOP and bad medicine · Sears Tower vs Mt Rushmore · Scared Christians · Crooked playing field · John O'Neill: The man who knew · Back to the top






. . .