culture, politics, commentary, criticism

Saturday, December 13, 2008
Killing the watchdog. I have yet to see this reported anywhere, but an anonymous commenter named trademonster on an investment forum said
this (notice the dates):
01-09-06 06:49 AM
I've heard that SEC is going to shut down Madoff financial and all of their hedge funds for SEC violations. Can anyone confirm this?
And this:
01-14-06 02:52 PM
I actually got some update and found out that it's Spitzer's office doing the investigation not SEC. But I don't know what the scope of the investigation is.
Suddenly Spitzer's dalliances with a hooker don't seem quite as fundmentally important to the financial health of this country.

We need people who understand the system to police it. No matter how sanctimonious or egomaniacal you may find him, Spitzer understands the financial system. If these posts are true, somebody in power was more interested in the the details of Eliot Spitzer's transactions than Bernard L. Madoff's. They were obviously more interested in killing the watchdog than in catching the billionaire burglar.
.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Prostitution is at least an honest profession. I'll show you my balance sheet if you show me yours. No? Well, let's insure our multibillion crap-loan transaction just in case. Hundreds of times over.

Everyone agrees that the current financial crisis is a self-engineered affair, an circle jerk orgy of fantasy profits emanating from eight years of Wall Street masturbatory excess — unfettered and unregulated because the laws were sneaked through while no one was looking.* And yet here we sit as the brew for our own 21st century Great Depression simmers menacingly, affecting every single American and possibly billions more around the globe.

Maybe one of the reasons "nobody saw it coming" is because "nobody" was too busy fishing through the bank transactions of one of Wall Street's most insightful and powerful critics,
Eliot Spitzer.

*Phil Gramm's beloved deregulatory legislation passed in December 2000, the height of the Bush-Gore election controversy. Legislation permitting massive, unaccountable capital leverage for the biggest investment banks passed in August 2004, the height of the Swift Boating of John Kerry.
.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Fixing the unfixable. All the hot air about who Obama should or shouldn't appoint to his cabinet won't do a damn thing about bringing to justice the people responsible for
this.

Click on each photographer's name if you want to be sick.
.
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Party like it's 1997. I'm in the mood for a quick review of the Clinton years. Let's look at a few milestones in the S&P 500, with closings on the dates shown:

S&P Closing     Milestone date
500.97         March 24, 1995
600.07         November 17, 1995
700.66         October 11, 1996
802.77         February 12, 1997
904.03         July 2, 1997
1,001.27       February 2, 1998
1,105.65       March 24, 1998
1,202.84       December 21, 1998
1,307.26       March 15, 1999
1,403.28       July 9, 1999
1,500.64       March 22, 2000

909.92         October 9, 2008


We are back to 1997. Eleven years of American investment up in smoke.

Heckuva job, Bushie, Hank, Alan, Phil Gramm, John McCain, and the rest of the deregulating laissez-faire right.

Sources:
Clinton dates, Bush's achievement today.
.
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
More like this, please. Some guy spots former Lehman CEO Richard Fuld on a gym treadmill, walks right up to him, and
knocks him out cold.
.
Friday, October 03, 2008
Plutocrats win! From the shit-eating, high-five grins on these two men's faces, it seems clear that today's $700 billion bailout may end up being even a bigger legislative and strategic mistake for the taxpayers of this country than the Iraq war itself.

.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Outrage fatigue. I have ceased to care about McStupid's Britney video and Obama's acting presidency. Or the New Yorker cover. Or Cindy McCain's 20 painkillers a day. Or the endless hand-wringing about the fucking narrative.

The 24/7 minutiae of yet another artificial campaign horserace cannot captivate me. The big story is this: The Democrats have failed to hold the existing administration accountable for its flagrant and abundant crimes against Americans and Iraqis and Afghanis and all humanity. History will not be kind to Nancy and Harry, thanks to their perfect ineffectuality. History will also judge the present crop of American citizens as unbearably privileged and hopelessly idiotic for sitting complacently watching CNN while the oily machinery behind this administration waltzed off with the contents of the US Treasury and whatever coin it found in the pockets of the American working class.

If McCain wins, it will be because Americans deserve him, just as we have deserved Bush Junior. If Obama wins, he will be a glorified janitor for the endless piles of shit the GOP left in its wake. Just as Bill Clinton was for Reagan and Bush Senior.

Our complacency will be our downfall, and I no longer care. Let Rush Limbaugh and ExxonMobil have America — it's becoming a crumbling shithole anyway.

And on that happy note, we end the blog.
.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Once again, the punchline is Texas.
WSJ:
Texas had some of the cheapest power rates in the country when it zapped most of the state's electric regulations six years ago, convinced that rollicking competition would drive prices even lower.

This summer, electricity there is some of the nation's priciest.

Power costs are rising in the rest of the U.S., but everything is bigger in Texas: On a hot day in May, wholesale prices rose briefly to more than $4 a kilowatt hour -- about 40 times the national average.
Remember the California electricity crisis? That was likewise engineered by the magic formula of deregulators plus Texans — the GOP plus Enron.

The criminal genius of Enron serves as the core business model for Bushian GOP. "When then-Gov. George W. Bush signed the state's deregulation bill in 1999, he assured that 'competition in the electric industry will benefit Texans by reducing monthly rates and offering consumers more choices.' The law, which took effect in 2002, left few restrictions on what power generators could charge and what consumers could pay."

"Reducing monthly rates and offering consumers more choices." Ha ha ha ha ha. Texas reaps what it sows.
.
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Emergency retirement plan: elder suicide. "Emergency retirement plan: revolver with 3 bullets... in case the first 2 don't work. Coming soon to an America near you." A prophetic comment by
Mike Hunt on an otherwise sober post called "Inflation and Its Impact on Retirement" by Rod Ferguson.

With just 20 percent of today's working Americans expected to be financially secure in retirement, we will almost certainly be considering socially sanctioned suicide among our options. In a deeply tragic way, it will be fascinating to see how elder suicide will become ritualized, dignified, and euphemized as our society collectively begins to understand the gravity of the lost Bush decade — investment returns of crucial importance that never materialized. As workers now deplete their Bush-stagnant 401(k) plans to pay for their financial Bush-hardships in gasoline and real estate, there will be even less savings for them to depend upon in the coming decade.

Those who would privatize Social Security, i.e., Republicans, are exactly the ones who cannot produce a viable economy with market returns that would justify such a radical rethinking of America's most successful social program.
.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
The pause that refreshes. I'm halfway through my monthlong break. How about you?
.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Healthcare Republican style. Here's a reason to vote for McCain: health insurance that doubles in cost while 15 million people lose coverage (
InvestmentNews):
Some 25 million U.S. adults with health insurance in 2007 faced financial stress due to insufficient coverage, according to a study from The Commonwealth Fund.

The ranks of the underinsured have increased by 60% between 2003 — when the New York-based health research foundation performed its first analysis — and 2007.

The full results were published today in the Health Affairs journal.

Health care premiums have skyrocketed between 2000 and 2007, rising by 91% compared to only a 24% increase in wages.

Last year, 17.2 million individuals said that their out-of-pocket medical expenses were equal to at least 10% of their family annual income, compared to 8.9 million in 2003.

The study noted that adults with annual incomes below $20,000 were at the highest risk of being uninsured or underinsured,

But people in higher wealth brackets have also been affected: 22 million people with income between $40,000 and $99,999 said they had insufficient coverage, compared to 9 million in 2003.

Meanwhile, seven million people who make more than $100,000 said they were uninsured in 2007, up from one million in 2003.

Although individuals between ages 50 and 64 were most likely to be insured, fewer of them had sufficient coverage, as 65% were fully insured last year, down from 74% in 2003.
You can apply the same logic to gasoline prices, food prices, the US dollar, the trade deficit, energy deregulation, the US Attorney's office, Iraq, you name it — the Republicans touch it, and it gets ruined.

Honk if you love incompetence!
.
Friday, June 06, 2008
One out of 3 Marines is broke. Enlisted Marines are suffering financial problems that are serious enough to affect national security, not to mention their own financial security. From a letter by two directors of the Foundation for Financial Planning to
Investment Advisor Magazine:
...nearly 30% of all enlisted Marines, rank E-1 to E-4, have financial problems serious enough to affect security clearances. This is causing some security jobs to go unfilled, jeopardizing not only careers, but also the country’s security. Credit scores are part of the criteria used by the military to determine security clearances and over drafts, pay day lending loans, maxed out credit cards, late payments, are all leading to poor credit scores.
But it's okay that Marines are broke because, as Dick Cheney pointed out, they volunteered for this.
.
Thursday, June 05, 2008
Like taking candy from a Christian. If Republicans have proven anything in the last several years it's this: When you want to steal on an epic scale, pretend you're religious. Here's another example (
Investment News):
A rep affiliated with LPL Financial allegedly stole $5 million from about two dozen people he knew from church and Little League.

The adviser, James J. Buchanan, has been charged with one count of fraud and 14 counts of theft, according to an indictment filed May 12 with the Maricopa (Ariz.) County Superior Court.

Each of those are felony counts.

Mr. Buchanan, who is being held in lieu of a $1 million cash bond, joined LPL of Boston in 2006.

Before that, he was affiliated with Ameriprise Financial Inc. of Minneapolis.

The alleged fraud and theft has been going on since 2001 through April, when he was fired by LPL, according to the indictment.

Maricopa County includes Phoenix and Scottsdale and the surrounding suburbs.

Investigators believe there are numerous victims and an unknown amount of damages.

Court documents paint a picture of Mr. Buchanan committing affinity fraud, a scam that preys upon members of an identifiable group, such as a religious community.

He posed as a certified financial planner, persuading many elderly clients to invest their life savings with him.

The alleged fraud began to unravel in March, when one victim reported to the Maricopa County sheriff that she had been defrauded of $200,000 after Mr. Buchanan pleaded with her to keep quiet, court documents show.

Most of the victims reported that they invested with money with Buchanan because he was revered as an honest Christian man,” said an addendum to the case filing.

“Buchanan was a board member with his church, and offered help to many people in his membership.”

Some of the investors’ money went into Mr. Buchanan’s personal bank account, the addendum said.

Mr. Buchanan also allegedly stole $1 million from his church, the Christ Life Church of Tempe, Ariz.

One victim was a retired police officer who Mr. Buchanan talked into taking early retirement based upon the returns he promised the officer would realize on his investment.
In the investment world we have observed smooth-talking Christian thieves before, notably Leo Wells of Wells Real Estate and Wells REIT. Showy Christians distract you with great displays of their high-toned morality for one purpose: to get their hands on your wallet.

If my financial advisor or banker made a big show of his Christianity, I would withdraw my funds immediately.
.
Friday, May 30, 2008
I wish I had a dollar for every GOP crime because then I would be even richer than
Igor Olenicoff:
Criminal court filings in California and Florida highlight the ways in which UBS -- and other banks -- worked with California real-estate developer Igor Olenicoff to establish shell companies used to avoid paying taxes.

For more than a decade, between 1992 and 2007, Mr. Olenicoff moved nearly $500 million between banks in London, the Bahamas, Switzerland and Liechtenstein using the names of at least six corporate entities, including ones named Sovereign Bancorp Ltd., National Depository Corp. Ltd. and Guardian Guarantee Co. Ltd. [...]

About a week later, in what appears to be one of the first transactions with UBS, Mr. Olenicoff instructed Barclays PLC to move $89 million to an account at UBS. More transfers took place in 2002, including the movement of $60 million to a Danish shell corporation with an account at a Liechtenstein bank that court documents don't identify.
Tax thief UBS is vice-chaired by Sen. Phil Gramm (R-Texas) while he is also co-chairing John McCain’s presidential campaign.

Igor Olenicoff was a generous supporter of Mitt Romney and is #286 on the Forbes 400 list of rich folk, advertising the usual donations to orphanages to cover his larger crimes.

Republicans don't like paying taxes, but with Iraq they have proved they love wasting the taxes you pay.
.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Scott and Jeff sitting in a tree. Who did conscience-stricken Scott McClellan always turn to when he needed a softball? The GOP shill and loyal escort,
Jeff Gannon (2/10/05).
Q Jeff Gannon. How did he get a White House pass, or what kind of credentials did he have?

MR. McCLELLAN: Just like anyone else who comes to the White House.

Q Hard pass?

MR. McCLELLAN: No, he had never applied for a hard pass. He had a daily pass. I think he's been coming for --

Q Was he coming for --

MR. McCLELLAN: Hang on. I think he's been coming for more than two years now.

Q Under what name?

MR. McCLELLAN: Sorry?

Q Under what name?

MR. McCLELLAN: Well, you have to get cleared. You have to -- just like anybody else that comes to the White House, you have to have your full name, your Social Security number and your birth date. So you have to be cleared just like anybody else.

Q So he was being cleared under James Guckert, or whatever his name is?

MR. McCLELLAN: My understanding, yes.

Q Okay, and how did he get picked to get a question asked at the last news conference?

MR. McCLELLAN: He didn't. The President didn't have a list. The President didn't -- he was in the briefing room. There are assigned seats in the briefing room. We didn't do any assigning of seats, and the President worked his way through the rows, and called on people as he came to them. He doesn't know who he is.

Q Were you aware that he had another name?

MR. McCLELLAN: Was I aware? I had heard that. I had heard that, yes, recently.

Q But did you know during all this time that he really wasn't Jeff Gannon?

MR. McCLELLAN: I heard at some point, yes -- previously.
Nine months earlier (5/10/04):

Jeff Gannon: In your denunciations of the Abu Ghraib photos, you've used words like "sickening," "disgusting" and "reprehensible." Will you have any adjectives left to adequately describe the pictures from Saddam's rape rooms and torture chambers? And will Americans ever see those images?

Scott McClellan: I'm glad you brought that up, Jeff, because the President talks about that often.
.
Energy conservation, Texas-style. Everywhere else in the USA, people are driving less, taking public transit more, screwing in those CFLs, and generally keeping a tighter lid on their energy usage.
Not in Houston:
How air-conditioned is Houston? Consider this: While highs are in the 90s outdoors, chilled workers smuggle space heaters into their offices.

"They're everywhere," says Heat Throat, my informant. A free-lance paralegal, she works with several downtown law firms. Often she brings a space heater and hides it under her desk — just like most of the office's other female workers. [...]

One time, a big firm's managing partner asked to borrow her space heater to warm his own office. "I hated to let it go," she says. "But he's a managing partner, so what can you say?"

"I'm amazed by the number of people who come in looking for heaters in summer," says Pauline Berry, who works at Southland Hardware on Westheimer.
Wait until Texans find out there have been major discoveries up north where the human brain apparently still functions. Thermostats and, when they fail, cardigans.
.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
An inspired idea.
Supreme Court Justice Hillary Clinton:
It's likely that the next president will face at least one Supreme Court vacancy. Obama should promise Hillary Clinton, now, that if he wins in November, the vacancy will be hers, making her first on a list of one.

Obama and Clinton have wound up agreeing on nearly every major issue during the campaign; at the end of the day, they share many orthodoxies. Unless the Supreme Court were to get mired in minuscule details of what constitutes universal health care, Obama could assume that he'd be pleased with most Clinton votes, certainly on major issues such as abortion.

Obama could also appreciate Clinton's undeniably keen mind. Even Clinton detractors have noted her remarkable mental skills; she would be equal to any legal or intellectual challenge she would face as a justice. The fact that she hasn't served on a bench before would be inconsequential, considering her experience in law and in government.

If Obama were to promise Clinton the first court vacancy, her supporters would actually have a stronger incentive to support him for president than they would if she were going to be vice president. Given the Supreme Court's delicate liberal-conservative balance, she would play a major role in charting the country's future; there is no guarantee that a Clinton vice presidency would achieve such importance.
Despite its infatuation with "activist" judges, the right's response to the Clinton years was Scalia throwing the 2000 election, followed by Roberts and Alito.

This inspired idea has the delicious aroma of karma about it. Much better than VP — Justice Hillary Clinton!
.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Finishing what she started. I am a Hillary supporter who will fully support Obama if (i.e., when) he wins the nomination, but that doesn't diminish my agreement with
Avedon:
Last night at the pub someone asked me what I thought Hillary was doing. Oddly enough, I've never actually seriously considered the question - mostly just thought that the theories I keep hearing (like that she wants to be McCain's runningmate!) don't sound right to me. And sure, I do think she's hanging in there just in case something does happen to change the terrain, no matter how slim the chance is, but it occurred to me at that moment that it's more than that. "I think she's running all the bases," I said. "She's the first woman in history to win a state primary, and she's won a lot more. She's running pretty close to the front-runner. It's a major historic moment." And the more I think about it, the more I think it has to be part of what's driving her. There's a bit of climbing the mountain because it's there, and wanting to be able to stand up in the end and say something like, "Never let it be said that a woman can't go the distance." It doesn't matter if someone else breaks the tape, just as long as she finishes the race. (And think how she'd feel if something did happen before Denver to tank Obama and she hadn't.) I've been unhappy with a lot of things about Hillary, but there's a part of me that kind of admires that. Because she wouldn't just be doing that for herself - she's doing it for every little girl who was ever told she can't.
This is the tragedy of this beautiful historic moment — there is so much at stake in the eyes of all American women and all American people of color. Hillary is not tearing the party apart; what she's doing is running a close race with tenacity (and occasional bad judgment) against a formidable opponent.

What's tearing the party apart is this country's history of sexism and racism. And the irony is that Democrats, more often than not, are the good guys in the struggles against both of these blights on our nation, a claim the Republican party cannot make. This election is about much more than these two remarkable and historic individuals. It's about the restoration of American values to our people and our government and our reputation around the globe — values and a reputation that have been hijacked not by bin Laden but by Bush-Cheney.

That's why we Democrats will unify behind our nominee no matter who he or she turns out to be. Meanwhile, Hillary should press on. This is no time for her to become a shrinking violet "for the good of the party." She's thinking much bigger than that.
.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Maybe she can explain Sunni vs. Shi'a to John McCain. Remember Vicki Iseman, the lobbyist who
allegedly had an affair with McCain while he was married to Cindy "Sugar Mom" McCain?

What a sexist and inflammatory insinuation! It turns out that her rapid rise within the ranks of lobbyists is entirely justified by the richness of her background and experience. After all, wouldn't the senior partner of any top lobbying firm have started out as a receptionist with a degree in elementary education?
Ms. Iseman graduated from Indiana University of Pennsylvania in 1990 with a degree in elementary education and ventured to Washington, where she was hired as a receptionist for Alcalde & Fay, a high-powered, high-profile lobbying firm based in Arlington, Va. She rose through the ranks to become a senior partner who, in 10-plus years, acquired a list of more than 30 clients including Carnival Cruise Lines, Paxson Communications, PriceWaterhouseCoopers, Telemundo Network, and the cities of Miami and Palm Springs, Calif. The bulk of her work involved telecommunications.
Hopefully all that training in elementary education won't go to waste as she explains the economy, foreign policy, and the gas tax to McMaverick.
.
Friday, May 09, 2008
They're young, fit, GOP, and not in Iraq. Jenna Bush and Henry Hager tie the knot this weekend. She will be wearing
Oscar de la Renta instead of camouflage. He's a former White House staffer and the son of the Virginia Republican Party chairman. "Jenna and Henry will be married at twilight in front of a limestone altar and cross near a man-made lake on the property."

Neither has volunteered for the war their party started for reasons that have yet to be explained five years on. They are a disgrace to our nation, and a slap in the face of every American man and woman in Iraq and Afghanistan — not to mention every taxpayer who has financed Daddy's private grudge match with Saddam (and Jenna's granddad).

According to the Houston Chronicle, they will be honeymooning in Europe instead of central Asia.

.
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Why I will never contribute to a presidential campaign. Now that there is discussion of
Obama retiring Hillary's campaign debt, I am reminded of why I would never contribute to presidential campaigns: because they reward exactly those people who pollute the system.

I'm speaking specifically of ABC, NBC, and Fox News and all the other television outlets who magically use our broadcast air (which we own as a common good) and cable bandwidth (which we pay cash for) to receive $3 billion in campaign advertising revenues while they produce such inescapable monstrosities as Stephanopoulos, Gibson, O'Reilly, Hannity, Russert, and the endless parade of sewage-spewing "guests" and "correspondents" like Pat Buchanan and Cokie Roberts.

Unlike my coming tax rebate, which is obviously going to BP and ExxonMobil by design, I refuse to allow my political contributions to go to ABC, NBC, and Fox News.
.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Why not a windfall profits tax? Instead of decreasing tax revenues with a "gas tax holiday" as McCain has suggested, why not impose a windfall profits tax on the excess net revenues the oil companies are receiving?

Today's WSJ shows quarterly net income (i.e., profit) for Shell of $9.08 billion. For BP it's $7.62 billion. Those profits are billions, not millions, for three months of income.

That's almost $17 billion of profit for just two companies, excluding ExxonMobil, in this quarter alone. At this rate, the combined profits of the industry for the year will exceed $100 billion. Even in rapidly decaying US dollars, that's a fuckload of money.

Surely some of that profit could be diverted to pay for the war that has caused to price of oil to skyrocket, thus rewarding oil executives quite handsomely for doing absolutely nothing — in direct contrast to American soldiers, who, as Dick Cheney has unkindly pointed out, are volunteers after all.

On the other hand, we the American taxpayers are not volunteers. Indiana's middle class is paying more for the war than the oil conglomerates. It is only fitting that BP, Shell, and ExxonMobil be harshly taxed to help pay for the war that makes them so fucking profitable.
.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Cheney was its CEO until 2000. What a sweet subsidiary of Halliburton is
KBR, Inc. (formerly Kellogg Brown & Root):
WASHINGTON — KBR employees working in Iraq stole weapons, artwork and even gold to make spurs for cowboy boots, former company workers told Senate Democrats today.

Appearing before a Democrats-only panel looking into allegations of contracting abuses in Iraq, the one-time employees accused their co-workers of widespread improper activity.

Linda Warren, a 50-year-old Texas woman who worked as a laundry foreman and recreation director for the Houston-based contracting giant in Iraq, told lawmakers in a prepared statement that her co-workers doing construction in Iraqi palaces and municipal buildings stole wood carvings, tapestries, crystal "and even melted down gold to make spurs for cowboy boots."

Warren told lawmakers she was reprimanded by a supervisor in 2004 for giving water to Iraqi workers laboring in a sweltering laundry building.

"You can take their gold and silver, rip their tapestries off the wall, but I can't give them a drink of water," Warren, in a prepared statement, said she told the supervisor.

Warren said she was reminded that she had signed a confidentiality agreement and then told that an American woman "wouldn't last very long on the streets of Baghdad."
Looting, fraud, rape — it's just Houston business as usual.
.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Republican Kama Sutra. On May 10, two short weeks from now, MBA daughter Jenna Bush and MBA student Henry Hager will get married at
her family's “ranch” near Crawford. What could be more exciting than a GOP wedding? A Republican honeymoon!

To mark the occasion (and to help them overcome the abstinence education prescribed by their elders), we present some of the most important Republican sexual positions that have served their ancestors so well in creating an atmosphere of endless privilege, practiced ignorance, and lifelong irresponsibility.


Missionary Accomplished



Backdoor Recount



Walking the Elephant



Paging Senator Craig



De-Baathification



Reverse Cowboy

Congratulations, Jenna and Henry! Consider this your early wedding present from everyone in Skimbleland!
.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
The great truth of 21st century America. Thomas Frank, writing in yesterday's
WSJ: "The landmark political fact of our time is the replacement of our middle-class republic by a plutocracy."
.
Friday, April 18, 2008
The scorched economy policy. Now in its last throes, the Republican administration is determined to take the country and its economy down with it as it collapses into the ashcan of history.
Wall Street Journal:
Natural-gas prices in the U.S. have risen 93% since August as power-hungry nations compete in a global market that scarcely existed five years ago. The trend has profound implications for the troubled U.S. economy.
Natural gas doubles in eight months. Gasoline is approaching four times the price it was when the first Clinton left office. Our all-energy-crony White House is determined to squeeze every last penny from the economy they sought to destroy.

Given the evidence of the economy, Iraq, and New Orleans, I suppose Republicans don't believe in leaving a campground in better shape than you found it.
.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Jenna Bush's Bridesmaids to be Texas Belles! That's the latest news from
Women's Wear Daily.

That's so weird, because I thought for sure her wedding party would have an Iraqi civilian deaths (PDF) theme, a Yoo torture memo (PDF) theme, or even a Blackwater mercenary apparel theme.

Choosing just the right look for the wedding party can be such a risky business! I guess the young white Texas Republican chickenhawk theme is the safe choice.
.
Now that's what I call integrity! "Pope Benedict XVI said on Tuesday that following the Roman Catholic Church’s child sexual abuse scandals in the United States, the church is reviewing candidates for the priesthood with the objective of excluding those with a tendency to
molest children."

Would it be asking too much to review candidates for the presidency with the objective of excluding those with a tendency to commit to 100 years in Iraq?
.
Monday, April 14, 2008
We have met the enemy and he is the Bush White House. "If you consider what the government did to be torture, which is a crime according to U.S. and international law, Bush's statement shifts his role from being an accessory after the fact to being part of a conspiracy to commit." —
Dan Froomkin
.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Hard vs. soft economics. Optimism is shriveling in America (
WSJ Real Time Economics blog):

The irony is that the absolute peak of American optimism occurred during the years Republicans were actively impeaching President Clinton over a blowjob.

Therefore, fellatio shows positive correlation as an economic stimulus package. With fellatio in the White House, American optimism is firm and vigorous.

What we have learned since then is that White House war crimes and borrowing from China to invade Iraq stimulate only recession, i.e., economic flaccidity caused by Republican MBAs and CEOs.

On the optimistic-pessimistic scale, which would you rather see in the American economy: Democratic vigor or Republican flaccidity?
.
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
The parallel economy. Recession, job contraction, dollar falling, subprime credit crisis — the whole economy's in the dump, right? Not if you are in the business of creating flying palaces (
WSJ):
For super-rich fliers in search of the ultimate status symbol, the big problem isn't plunking down $50 million to $250 million for a new, full-size jetliner from Boeing or Airbus. It's finding someone to turn that plane into a flying palace.

These purveyors of customized interiors, called "completion centers," are increasingly sold out for years to come as demand for transport-size personal aircraft has soared from a handful a year to dozens. That means lots more work designing and installing mother-of-pearl vanities, gilded ceilings, exotic wood cabinets, hand-made carpeting, multihead showers -- even throne rooms and gyms. Some vendors design the china, crystal and sterling silver that travel on board, and a few have installed missile defense systems on the aircraft.

"We have more work than we can handle," says Jon Buccola, chief executive officer of outfitter Greenpoint Technologies Inc. of Kirkland, Wash. Greenpoint, which specializes in interiors on new Boeing 737 business jets, has won $100 million in new business since the start of the year and is talking to a potential client who won't even get his or her new aircraft until 2014, he says.
"An increasing number of wealthy individuals and heads of state are buying commercial-sized planes and are spending even more to have them customized with everything from master suites to gymnasiums." And did you take note of the private missile defense systems?

The only growth area in the American economy is the enhancement of stratospheric status symbols — the equivalent of shoe polish for plutocrats.

In its creation of a stateless über-wealthy parallel universe, the pluto-Republican view of the economy is not a chicken in every pot. It's a gym in every jet. And woe to all of you who have no jet.
.
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
Out of the car, into the Google. This is brilliant. Now you can use Google Maps to plan (and time) your public transit trips in
Chicago. Via Chicagoist.
.
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Children spoiled rotten. Steve Coll's new book "The Bin Ladens" takes a gander at some of the paper-thin adolescent psychology that rules our world (
NYT):
Just as recent books like Jacob Weisberg’s “Bush Tragedy” have underscored the role Oedipal rivalries may have played in George W. Bush’s presidency and his decision to go to war against Iraq, so this volume underscores the role that Freudian family dynamics may have played in Mr. bin Laden’s radicalization and his declaration of war against America.
However, you could have received this exact same insight from The Onion in October 2001 in its pithy article, Privileged Children Of Millionaires Square Off On World Stage.
.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
The lost decade. As the baby boomers prepare to retire, their savings have been severely diminished by those who would have happily privatized social security right out of existence (
WSJ):
Over the past 200 years, the stock market's steady upward march occasionally has been disrupted for long stretches, most recently during the Great Depression and the inflation-plagued 1970s. The current market turmoil suggests that we may be in another lost decade.

The stock market is trading right where it was nine years ago. Stocks, long touted as the best investment for the long term, have been one of the worst investments over the nine-year period, trounced even by lowly Treasury bonds.
Sharply reduced standards of living for America's seniors, due to significantly reduced investment returns during a crucial decade, will be another of the major long-term effects of the Bush-Cheney administration, its tax policy, its wastefulness, and its insane adventure in Iraq.

It is also worth noting that during the eight years of the Clinton administration, the Dow Jones industrial average and the S&P 500 went up over 300 percent. Neither of these indexes includes major amounts of Internet stock like the Nasdaq, so the Internet "bubble" didn't affect them as much.

It doesn't matter if you look at the president as the metaphorical or literal portfolio manager of the American economy. The choice is clear. Another Clinton is running for president this year: that's who I want in the White House.
.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Welcome to the Richard B. Cheney Autopsy Room for Service Members.

Five years ago the White House was evidently expecting company in the thousands, when they built twenty-three state of the art autopsy stations: "WASHINGTON, Oct. 29, 2003 – Military officials this week opened a new $30 million mortuary at Dover Air Force Base, Del."

"The mission of a mortuary is to prepare remains with dignity, care and respect," [Meg Falk, director of the Defense Department's Office of Family Policy] added. "If we expose that process to the media we lose that."

Really, Meg? A hell of a lot more than dignity, care and respect has been lost. With all due respect to the extremely difficult work of the mortuary workers, the least you can do is name the place after the people who will keep it populated well into the foreseeable future.

Via Cryptome.
.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
The Bush Legacy: overworked soup kitchens. You know the situation is bad when even the normally oblivious
Wall Street Journal takes notice on page one:
Add another institution to those getting squeezed by America's economic crunch: soup kitchens.

Across the country, groups that provide food to people in need are scrambling to make up for a loss of government-provided surplus items as commodity prices have soared. Surpluses have dropped as some commodities, like corn, are being turned into alternative fuels and others are going overseas as the weak dollar makes U.S. exports more palatable to other countries.

At the same time, food banks and soup kitchens say that people struggling with mortgage woes, rising gas prices and layoffs are increasingly turning to them for help. [...]

When his family ran out of food last week, Daniel Wheelus went to Prodisee Pantry, in Spanish Fort, Ala., for the first time. He received a full shopping cart, including a ham, that he said would last a week for himself, his wife and three children, ages 16, 12 and 10.

"They even gave my boy some clothes for school," he said. "They really, really helped."

Mr. Wheelus, 39 years old, earns $13.60 an hour working in an oil field 45 miles from his home. But it costs him $30 a day to fill up the Dodge Dakota pickup he drives to work. His utility bills have doubled to $400 a month from last year, he says. He says he lost his house in October after missing mortgage payments following knee surgery and now owes back taxes.
Permit an all-oil, all-war, all-crony agenda in the White House and Congress, and this is what you get.
.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Economic problem prevention, by Eliot Spitzer. The Dem watchdog resigns while the GOP foxes eat all the hens on Wall Street and in the US Treasury (
Chuck Jaffe, MarketWatch):
The truth, however, is that Spitzer's biggest, most lasting impact came in the [mutual] fund industry, and in a lot of ways that ordinary investors don't think about and fail to appreciate. Moreover, by uncovering the fund scandals when he did, he saved Wall Street from a much larger problem that, in hindsight, would appear to have been an inevitable consequence of the bad behavior that was happening in the fund world.
You mean Spitzer was preventing the kind of bad behavior that is ruining the world economy? Why would we want anyone like that working on our behalf?

Evidently we would rather have the pot-smoking, bridge-playing CEO of Bear Stearns and his criminally negligent management team rewarded while Spitzer's career goes up in smoke. Sex is such a vivid distraction from the nitty gritty of "privatized gain, socialized loss" — also known as GOP welfare.
.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Who could've predicted Bear Stearns? You, if you'd been reading here:

CEO smokes pot and plays bridge while Bear Stearns implodes, November 2007.

CEO asks his execs to raise money for Bush-Cheney 2004, October 2003.

Atrios today.

All of these Wall Street CEOs — Bear Stearns, Merrill Lynch, UBS, Goldman Sachs — were staunch and generous Bush-Cheney supporters. So who do you think will pay for their unforced errors?

You, if you're an American middle class taxpayer. The Republican position is to let them off the hook and bail them out no matter how stupendously they fuck up the entire economy. This smells a lot like the climax to the sequel of Neil and Poppy's S&L Crisis, Son of the WASP: The Legacy of the Turdblossom.

Meanwhile, Republican CEOs run wild and free, financial watchdog Spitzer is out of office for bedding a hooker, and Mary Ann from Gilligan's Island has been duly chastised by law enforcement for her pot smoking, in direct contrast to the public pot smoking of Bear Stearns's CEO James Cayne. The Republican perversion of justice marches on!
.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Thanks, Richard Russo. The novelist hits exactly the point about Spitzer I've been making
all week: "This is America, pal, where you can lead the nation into war on false pretenses and be rewarded with a second term in office, but where illicit sex is and has always been an impeachable offense."
.
Friday, March 14, 2008
How will we explain it to the children? All headlines from today's Wall Street Journal:
Bear Stearns in Free Fall
Markets Shake as Credit Fears Grow
Recession Gloom Gathers
Nervous Banks Drain Carlyle Fund
S&P's Grim Subprime Report
And yet no one will call for the immediate resignation of any of the people responsible for these catastrophes.

Because in the juvenile USA, sex is the only crime worth punishing! The only sin worth never forgiving!
.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
'Splain it to the children. Yahoo headline:
Explaining Spitzer scandal to children proving tricky for parents.

That's exactly how I felt about Enron, FISA, Iraq, subprime credit, Katrina, the national deficit, Halliburton, stop-loss, Diebold, the firing of US attorneys, Valerie Plame, social security privatization, the crashing dollar, the tripling of gas prices, and Rumsfeld's handshake with Saddam Hussein. That's excluding the other obvious GOP-related sex scandals of Larry Craig, Vitter, Jeff Gannon, etc.

All of these topics are so tricky to explain to children. And so selective of Yahoo to frame the headline in quite that way.
.
How long does it take...?
...for American intelligence agencies to find Osama bin Laden?
Seven years and counting.
...for American intelligence agencies to find a Democratic governor with a hooker?
Three weeks.
.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Who's dancing on Spitzer's grave? This may give us a clue as to how the wiretaps managed to find Spitzer instead of Al Qaeda (
Investment News):
Kenneth Langone, the target of former New York State Attorney General Eliot G. Spitzer's lawsuit regarding the hefty compensation package for former NYSE chairman Dick Grasso, felt little remorse for the Empire State's embattled governor, who is charged with having dealings with a prostitution ring.

"We all have our own private hells," Mr. Langone said in an interview with CNBC television on Monday night.

"I hope his private hell is hotter than everyone else's."

When asked if Mr. Spitzer should be forced to resign, Mr. Langone, a former director of the New York Stock Exchange and co-founder Home Depot, said: "Absolutely. He is a hypocrite. He destroyed reputations of people with good reputations and deserved reputations."
Well, gosh, that sounded sincere, until you realize that Langone was defending his role in giving former NYSE chairman Dick Grasso $187 million, about which Spitzer had made the wild claim that it wasn"t "fair and reasonable."

Governor Sex Fiend Spitzer made powerful enemies and is paying the price for it. Senator Sex Fiend Larry Craig, meanwhile, is free to go about his business of enacting the Republican agenda because he refused to resign over a trifling airport men's room blowjob.

Wall Street has bigger priorities than fighting Al Qaeda, despite its having attacked their clubhouse in lower Manhattan. They have grudges, you see, and payback is obviously a higher priority than security.
.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
A truly unique experience. It is quite true that Spitzer got his money's worth if a unique experience is what he was seeking (
Robert Frank's Wealth Report, WSJ):
According to a survey by Russ Alan Prince, president of Connecticut-based wealth-research firm Prince & Associates, in his book “The Sky’s The Limit,” a sizable percentage of the super wealthy use escorts. He surveyed 661 people who owned private jets. It found that 34% of males and 20% of females had paid for sex.

The most popular reason was “unique experiences” (71%), followed by “higher quality experiences” (57%). Conventional wisdom says that the rich visit escorts to avoid messy break-ups or extra demands for cash. But the study shows otherwise: “No strings attached,” ranked last as a reason.

“With the wealthy,” Mr. Prince says “it’s all about power and control and new experiences.”
Over one-third of male private jet owners admit to hiring escorts for "power and control and new experiences.”

Such beautiful motives! Let's give them more tax breaks — pronto! After all, somebody's got to wiretap Democratic governors, and it might as well be private jet owners and their Republican employees in the White House, on Capitol Hill, and on Wall Street.
.
Spitztacular! "I hope he announces today, 'I am a gay American.' That would totally make my day."

From
Capitolist, the graffiti wall of anonymous congressional staffers.
.
Monday, March 10, 2008
At least he wasn't in a men's room. Spitzer should make a solemn promise to resign exactly 30 days after Sen. Larry Craig (R-ID) resigns and after we find out who Jeff Gannon's White House clients were.
.
Who's yacht and who's not? The extreme ultra-rich, whom Bush showered with tax breaks and whom he describes as his "base," are defying every form of economic gravity that affects the rest of us (
Barron's):
Thanks to a global explosion of wealth over the past 10 years or so, the number of U.S. households with $1 million to $25 million in net worth has more than doubled. Households with $500 million and up have roughly tripled. [...]

True, only a tiny portion of all Americans meet our definition of rich: Just 0.20% of households have net worths of $25 million or more. But in absolute numbers, the group is considerable. If one representative from each of the 175,400 households filed into an NFL stadium at the same time, they wouldn't all find seats. In fact, they would have to go in two shifts -- and even then, some 15,000 would be left in the parking lots, tailgating in their Bentleys. [...]

WITH A NET WORTH OF $500 million or more, "You can buy whatever you want" in Manhattan real estate, says Mason. Or you can buy anywhere else. Some members of this group buy $20 million homes "all over the world," says Gary Gold, realty broker to the rich at Hilton & Highland in Los Angeles. He's been as surprised as anyone by the growing number of people who qualify for the Champagne & Caviar class. Five or 10 years ago, he says, "you'd know who they are. Now, they can have vast wealth and you don't know who they are."

Leslie Mandel, chief executive of the Rich List, a marketing company, contends there are now more than 2,000 Americans with net worths of a $1 billion or more, far more than the 400 who appear on Forbes' annual list (the cutoff for that is now $1.3 billion). Some bankers figure the number of billionaires is closer to 500, but either way, it's up remarkably from the 170 of 10 years ago. [...]

In his 2007 book about the wealth explosion, Richistan, Wall Street Journal writer Robert Frank tells the story of an 11-year-old girl who asked her father for a ride on a commercial airline even though the family owned its own jet. "I want to ride on a big plane with other people," the girl said.
Why didn't she or her siblings say, "I want my health insurance claims to be denied like other people," or "I want to know what real financial uncertainty feels like, just like the employees Daddy screwed out of their Enron 401(k) plans," or "I wish I knew what it felt like to be young and black and living in New Orleans's Third Ward during Katrina," or "Gosh, I wish I knew what it felt like to fight and become an amputee in Iraq or Afghanistan."

Think of this level of wealth as class warfare with a smiley face. Or no face at all. That's why we need true progressive income taxation, higher capital gains taxes, and estate taxes that kick in around $5 million.

The ultra-rich got everything they wanted from the most billionaire-friendly president in modern history and America is still shit dragging the heel of the global economy. Now it's our turn to tax the people who have profited so spectacularly from all the covertly calculated Republican carnage, both in dollars and in working-class blood, carried out in the name of faux family values and phony crusade-wars conducted with a costume cowboy hat.
.
Saturday, March 08, 2008
Five years ago.

There once was a “rancher” from Texas
Whose military fetish perplexes.
He started a war,
Shook his sabre for more,
While the rest of us search LexisNexis. (
link)
Saturday, 8 March, 2003 - The White House asked if President Bush could address the European Parliament, Baroness Williams revealed on BBC One's This Week show on Thursday. But, she said, Euro-MPs were told there was a condition attached to him making the speech: a standing ovation should be guaranteed. The speech has never taken place.
No standing ovation, no speech! Unlike Europeans, why didn't Americans think of not yielding to his infantile needs six years ago?
.
Friday, March 07, 2008
In the GOP, losers always win. Think about the size of your own pay increase, and what you had to do to earn it, as you read this (
WSJ):
General Motors Corp. gave Chairman and Chief Executive [George] Rick Wagoner a 33% raise for 2008 and equity compensation of at least $1.68 million for his performance in 2007, a year for which the auto maker reported a loss of $38.7 billion.
Once again, needless to say, this extremely accomplished loser is a proud Republican, giving generously to both Bush in 2004 and Romney in 2007.

Even reality show contestants have to do something worthwhile to win their payday. But not in the Republican Party of the United States of America, where colossal incompetence is treated like the birthright of kings.
.
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
Ultra-rich people, hurry up and die. Because your fat asses deserve to be taxed right out of existence (
WSJ):
The nation's top 400 taxpayers reported a total of $85.6 billion of income on their federal income-tax returns for 2005 -- an average of $213.9 million apiece, according to Internal Revenue Service data obtained by The Wall Street Journal.

Just to make the cutoff to join this exclusive club, you had to report income of at least $100.3 million, up sharply from $74.5 million the previous year. The average income among the top 400 in 2004 was $172.8 million.
Indeed, the top 400 taxpayers have greatly increased their share of individuals' income since the mid-1990s. The group accounted for 1.15% of total income in 2005, up from 1.02% the prior year -- and more than twice as large as its 0.49% share a decade earlier. It's the highest percentage since the early 1990s, which is as far back as the IRS data go. [...]

The average federal income-tax rate for the group was 18.23%. That's up from 18.16% the prior year, but lower than in any other year since 1992 -- and well below the average income-tax rate of nearly 30% back in 1995, when Bill Clinton was in the White House. [...]

Under current law, the basic federal estate-tax exemption, now $2 million, will soar to $3.5 million next year. In 2010, the tax is scheduled to disappear entirely -- but only for that one year. President Bush has long called for total elimination of what its opponents call the "death tax." But those efforts have fizzled in Congress. A likely compromise might include making the exclusion somewhere around $3.5 million to $5 million and cutting the top estate-tax rate, which is currently 45%.

The IRS numbers might also prompt calls for higher taxes of some kind on the super-rich, such as possibly a higher capital-gains tax rate for those making megamillions a year.
That $213.9 million apiece is for their annual income, not their overall net worth. Their "salary and wages" account for only 8.6 percent of their annual haul — the rest is dividends and capital gains and such, which are taxed at much lower rates than your paltry salary or your tiny wages.

So the ultra-rich are pulling in more than twice the money they used to, while paying two-thirds of the taxes they were under Clinton. Meanwhile, we borrow zillions from China to give tax stimulus checks to every American, whether they borrowed from a crooked subprime-pushing bank or not. It all makes perfect sense. In hell.

At least these rich people have only until 2010 to die tax-free. As I've predicted before, my guess is that 2010 is the year George H. W. Bush will die, because Junior wants his daddy's Saudi-CIA allowance untainted by something as working-class as taxes.
.
Love Republican Style.


For a couple of pro-lifers, they sure cause an awful lot of death.
.
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
Who put the "lie" in library? From the Chronicle of Higher Education's
back of the envelope design contest for the George W Bush Library at Southern Methodist University, this design is called "Fun Ranch":

It's funny tragic because it's true.
.
Friday, February 29, 2008
The Bush Legacy: America is 30 percent poorer. The dollar's purchasing power against 26 other currencies has plunged by more than 30 percent (
WSJ):
On Thursday, the dollar sank to a new record low against the euro, deepening a six-year slide in which it has fallen more than 40% versus the European currency and more than 20% against a broader basket of currencies. In late trading in New York, one euro fetched about $1.52, just two days after it surged through the symbolically important level of $1.50. [...]

The dollar's weakness adds upward pressure to the prices of commodities, most of which are traded in dollars. They're now soaring in value for a number of reasons including that they've become cheaper for buyers who hold other currencies, which drives up demand. An enfeebled dollar also means the reserves of many central banks are falling in value, a dilemma that isn't easily resolved.

The graphic is taken from the WSJ article, with one addition. The red line on the left side was added to show exactly when the Republicans, the self-anointed "grownups," took control of the White House and Congress.

We must give credit for our disasters where credit is due.
.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Someone please cut Tim Russert's mike. He is turning our presidential debates and national discourse into a right-wing cartoon.


Create your own presidential candidates at South Park Studios.
.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
A behind-the-scenes look at how our government functions. A new "position" is being called to your attention by the closet homosexual enablers at
National Review Online:
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Idaho Senator Larry Craig is currently seeking intern applications for the summer term, which runs from May to August. The application deadline is March 15, however if more time is needed for the application process, please contact Senator Craig's office for an extension.

"Interns have the chance to be an essential part of a working congressional office," said Craig. "They participate in the legislative process as well as ensure that constituent services run smoothly. For those interested in politics, it is an incredible opportunity to get a behind-the-scenes look at how our government functions while serving the people of Idaho."
Or perhaps for those interested in "public service" it is an incredible opportunity to get a within-the-stall look at how Republicans function.
.
Texas Retardlicans. A Texas Republican email, spotted on Charles Kuffner's
Chronicle blog:
On March 4th, Texas Republicans and Independents will have an opportunity to end Hillary Clinton's (and Bill's) presidential ambitions once and for all!

Since Texas has on open primary, Republicans and Independents should sign in at their polling place and request a Democratic ballot. They should then vote for Barack Obama. Even James Carville admits that if Hillary loses Texas, "she's done!" Republicans can help make this a reality!!! Just think, no more Clintons in the White House!

Voting Democratic this one time will have NO effect on your ability to vote in the next Republican primary or obviously on your vote in November. Since John McCain has the Republican nomination locked up, voting for McCain or Huckabee at this point will have no effect on the outcome on the Republican side.

After you vote during early voting or on March 4th, you ARE NOT done! Report back to your regular polling place at 7PM on March 4th to sign the Barack Obama list for caucus delegates. In a little known Texas voting quirk, 67 delegates to the Democratic convention will be seated because of these caucuses. This is a full one-third of the total number of Texas delegates. For Hillary to lose, she has to lose the primary votes AND the caucus votes.

I urge you to vote against Hillary Clinton by voting for Barack Obama. Please forward this e-mail to all your Texas Republican and Independent friends so that we can help ensure the Clinton's defeat on March 4th!!!
The Clinton administration represented the greatest expension of jobs, general prosperity and national fiscal health in our lifetimes. Your ex-governor's administration represented the most enormous deficits in history, as well as the loss of thousands of American lives in Iraq, even while Osama bin Laden still runs free seven years after he attacked New York and Washington. The evidence speaks for itself.

Are your testicles so threatened by Hillary Clinton that you cross party lines to prove how microscopic they are? And that includes you, GOP Texas women.
.
Tax the billionaires. Say what you want about Hillary, she is unafraid to speak politically dangerous truths to the powers that support her (
Investment News):
Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-NY, took swipes at hedge fund managers at campaign stops in Ohio on Feb. 19 and Wisconsin on Feb. 18 arguing that the top executives should not be immune from paying certain taxes.

Hillary Clinton has been the recipient of widespread support from some of the country’s top hedge fund managers in her 2008 bid for the White House, according to The New York Times.

Some of her biggest donors are hedge fund managers including James Simons of Renaissance Technologies LLC, Richard Perry of Perry Capital LLC, David Shaw of D.E. Shaw & Co., Glenn Dubin of Highbridge Capital Inc. and Tom Steyer of Farallon Capital Management, LLC according to the Times.

Sen. Clinton’s daughter Chelsea also works for the New York-based hedge fund Avenue Capital Group.
Why is taxing hedge fund managers an issue? Because hedge fund managers, even more than CEOs, are the kings of our twisted economy. I cannot say this loudly enough: Despite being centimillionaires, they pay no income taxes. Their compensation is considered to be "capital gains" and is taxed at the lower rate that is levied on investment returns. In other words, they don't work, they only profit.

Is one hedge fund manager really worth thousands and thousands of teachers? That is exactly what the American economy is saying, loud and clear... "Combined, the top 25 hedge fund managers last year earned $14 billion — enough to pay New York City’s 80,000 public school teachers for nearly three years." New York Times
.
Friday, February 22, 2008
Dancing in a bubble. Q: What happens when an enormously unpopular president needs to get away from his country and the war he started?

A: He goes to Africa to
dance (link goes to Guardian video of Bush gyrating in Liberia).

.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
The box is better than the toy. Financial prosperity is nice but it isn't everything. Perhaps America's empty-headed worship of markets, and the hard times that will result*, will give us fresh opportunities to have simple thoughts like these (
Michel Gondry in The Onion):
I truly believe that kids enjoy the box better than the car or the toy that's inside. So many times during Christmas, watching a kid, or even myself… There is excitement toward your toy, but then you put the toy on the side and something is created with the package. It's a very American thing that everything has to be a business. Americans think… I like America, or I would not be here. There are great qualities to this country. But this sense that everything has to be a business is sometimes overwhelming.
I am reminded of Craig Newmark (founder of Craigslist) who said that money is not an incentive for him. In human enterprises the challenge and the satisfaction are often, if not usually, elsewhere.

If American can wake up from its money worship and stop playing with and obsessing about its toys, then maybe the creativity lurking in the boxes will have an opportunity to see the light of day again.

*Subprime credit banking crisis, Bush-Cheney war and tax-cutting debts, record oil prices, nascent recession and secular bear market, burgeoning trade deficit, weakening dollar, shrinking manufacturing base, vanishing R&D, dwindling market share of the global capital markets — do I need to go on?
.
Friday, February 15, 2008
Oops, there goes another rubber toy plant. Yesterday while I was rudely mocking Houston for its Valentine's weekend gun show, right up here in northern Illinois a graduate student was planning his own pathetic gun show.

So: sincere apologies to Houston. My implication of its backwardness was way out of line. Especially as they chose the day before Valentine's Day as the day to overturn their legal ban on
sex-toy sellers:

"This is a happy day for us," said Gino Barone, who owns Carmens Boutique and Videos, which has four Houston locations. "We found our customers want these items. Ladies, couples come to buy. The demand is so great. This law was so ridiculous. ... It's time we got the government out of their lives." [...]

Barone said he sold the sex novelties despite the legal ban. "Our stores are loaded with them," he said. "They tried to act like this was some monster. This was only a toy." [...] Barone said the days before Valentine's Day are among the busiest of the year.


'Cause they've got high hopes.
.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Valentine's weekend in Houston. For northerners Valentine's Day may be high risk because it's high calorie, but down in Houston the risks are somewhat higher. Valentine's weekend is
high caliber:


Virginia may be for lovers, but Texas is for shooters and stabbers.
.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Latest music discovery.
We're Late For Class.
.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Soon only bankers will be able to change their sex. The rest of the USA can barely get medical insurance for routine problems, but bankers are rolling in coverage (
NYT Dealbook):
Goldman Sachs bankers and traders enjoy famously big bonuses and, this year, a little extra job security thanks to their firm’s ability to steer clear of the worst effects of the subprime mortgage debacle.

Now, they can add something else to the list of reasons why life is great at Goldman: free sex-change surgery. [...]

Goldman employees can undergo the procedure, which normally costs anywhere from $5,000 to $150,000, and have it paid for entirely by their medical insurance.

Goldman isn’t the first financial firm to cover sex-change surgery for its workers. A recent survey of more than 1,000 employers conducted by the Human Rights Campaign found that many banks, law firms and other large companies have added at least partial coverage of transgender treatments to their medical plans.

Bank of America, Wachovia and Deutsche Bank are among the firms who now cover such treatments to some extent, Fortune.com said.
Goldman is obviously incredibly forward-thinking because they were among the few banks to actually profit from subprime credit by simultaneously selling it and shorting it. Talk about identity ambivalence!

Think of free sex-change surgery as a stimulus package. (No, not that kind.) Sex-change coverage will stimulate the economy because bankers will have to get whole new wardrobes and makeup. Snap, snap!
.
Guilty displeasures. I admit it: one of my baddest habits is watching the Grammys. Like smokers outside an office building who won't make eye contact with you, Grammy watchers know they're only hurting themselves.

Pop music celebrity is the dirty nicotine of entertainment, even without Britney. And this year was dirtier and stinkier than usual (I'm talking to you, Kanye), resulting in even heavier doses of empty and toxic smoke. I have nothing to add to
Terry Sawyer's review, which is near-perfect in its articulation of disgust (along with a couple of strange and wonderful highlights that I also happen to agree with — Gershwin and Feist).

Sawyer: "These big top overkills prove to me conclusively that something can be both spectacular and unmoving." Far beyond the Grammys, this statement pretty much describes the awards and game and reality shows that comprise the bulk of network television.

Excuse me while I go to rehab.
.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
I hate Katie Couric. I'm watching her interview Hillary Clinton on 60 Minutes, and it is clear from the line of questioning that Katie Couric is not fit to be a stringer for a women's magazine at the grocery checkout, let alone the face of CBS News. She is a marshmallow-headed featherweight who does not even deserve to get Hillary's autograph, much less an interview. The Obama interview that preceded it didn't have the moronic fake-contentious quality that seems to be her stock in trade.

Given her total lack of ability to add any insight to a serious topic, Katie Couric should not be permitted to edit a high school yearbook let alone a presidential campaign. There are plenty of disgraceful performers in American journalism, and she is among the worst.
.
Saturday, February 09, 2008
Because I care. The thousands of you Googlers who arrive here searching for
"blow job classes illinois" are no doubt disappointed by my post referring to Martha Stewart's blow job — that is, the case made against Martha Stewart's stock trade being very reminiscent of the case made against another famous Democrat way back in 1998.

So let's get right to the good stuff. What you came here for is blow job classes in Illinois, specifically in Chicago, so here's exactly what you want: G Boutique's "How to Give a Great Blow Job" class.

Description: "The hummer, the yummer, the flicker, the tickler... learn these and lots more tips and techniques. Take this class and Blow him away!" You can even make it a private class with up to 20 friends. It's not clear whether Sadie Allison's Tickle His Pickle is the required textbook, whether there will be a pop quiz, or what will be on the final exam. Emission accomplished?

Good luck. While you're boning up and studying hard, think of Skimble!

You're welcome.
.
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Go All-American! The US primary system is such antiquated, patchwork bullshit. And even 2/3 of the Wall Street Journal's readers
agree:


In addition to neutralizing the toxic effect of Iowa and New Hampshire, we should also go to a direct proportional vote in all 50 states.

Someday ordinary American voters ought to celebrate the joy of democracy with a meaningful process, instead of just creating a sideshow to precede the purple thumbs of superdelegates.
.
Friday, February 01, 2008
State of the Union in 18 seconds.



More from Joe Seigenthaler. Explanation.
.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
The bridge to common sense just fell down. Because American bankers are greedy twits who engineered the the subprime mortgage crisis (reminiscent of the bogus S&L crisis under daddy Bush), the US wants to borrow money from China to give me my tax "rebate."

Meanwhile at least 17,000 bridges in the U.S. went more than two years between safety inspections, according to federal records analyzed by
msnbc.com.
.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Houston GOP raises $500,000 for pooping difficulties. As American troops remain trapped in an Iraqi quagmire of exclusively Republican design, the GOP glitterati of Houston amuse themselves by
raising vast sums of money for the Crohn's & Colitis Foundation of America, i.e., the foundation for people with pooping difficulties.


Giuliani and RNC supporter Astrid and Gene Van Dyke, left,
with Vanessa Sendukas (wife of Giuliani supporter Perry Sendukas).
Photo by Dave Rossman, Houston Chronicle
.

Full disclosure: I experience and have been treated for ulcerative colitis — and yet this is one of the most idiotic displays of philanthropic charade I have ever seen. There is no Crohn's crisis — it affects only 6 out of 100,000 North Americans. Contrast that figure with the 3,900+ Americans who have died in the search for Saddam Hussein's imaginary WMD — a deceptive Bush/Cheney policy these three black-tie cretins doubtlessly supported, as evidenced by their financial backing and affection for Rudy Giuliani.

It's unfortunate that all the other problems of the world — notably, the ones these people vote for — have yet to be solved. Surely Houston’s wealthiest GOP layabouts can find better reasons to play dress-up among the catastrophes and human tragedies they have caused.
.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Genius party at Davos. Here's what
the world's economic Einsteins are saying to us mere mortals:
"What we have now are the foreseeable consequences of bad economic management.''
- Joseph Stiglitz, the 2001 Nobel Memorial Prize winner for economics

"In this case the U.S. is going to have a protracted case of pneumonia.''
- Nouriel Roubini, chairman of New York-based Roubini Global Economics, citing the maxim that if the U.S. economy sneezes, the rest of the world catches a cold

The U.S. economy is "resilient, its structure sound, and its long-term economic fundamentals are healthy. And our economy will remain a leading engine of global economic growth.''
- U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice
That last one is probably also true, but it sure stinks of pig lipstick.
.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
$5.16 trillion lost since New Year's Day. $1.27 trillion was lost only in the USA. That doesn't include the other $3.88 trillion lost by the other major exchanges &mdash for a total of $5.16 trillion lost in the last three weeks (
WSJ Marketbeat blog).

Market Cap Wipe-out
Source: Birinyi Associates

IndexCountryMarket Cap Lost (bil)% Change
S&P 500USA$1,279.7-9.7%
FTSE-100U.K.$484.5-15.6%
CSI 300China$402.3-12.3%
Nikkei 225Japan$369.8-12.9%
CAC 40France$336-16.3%
MICEX*Russia$268.7-26.6%
S&P/TSXCanada$266.7-16.2%
S&P/ASXAustralis$241.9-18.8%
DAXGermany$239.5-16.8%
Ibex 35Spain$185.3-20.4%
BovespaBrazil$170.3-21.2%
AmsterdamNetherlands$147.6-19.4%
Swiss MarketSwitzerland$119.7-12.7%
OMX StockholmSweden$116.6-17.5%
BSE SensexIndia$103.8-14.3%
Milan MIB30Italy$101.2-12.2%
FTSE/JSE AfricaSouth Africa$93.9-15.8%
OMX HelsinkiFinland$83.5-18.5%
OBX IndexNorway$76.6-25.7%
Merval**Argentina$73.5-13.5%

Junior came to Chicago right before his Middle East jaunt to tell us how strong the economy was.

It's like Katrina, but with money. Heckuva job, Georgie.
.



Greatest Hits · Alternatives to First Command Financial Planning · First Command, last resort, Part 3 · Part 2 · Part 1 · Stealing $50K from a widow: Wells Real Estate · Leo Wells, REITs and divine wealth · Sex-crazed Red State teenagers · What I hate: a manifesto · Spawn of Darleen Druyun · All-American high school sex party · Why is Ken Lay smiling? · Poppy's Enron birthday party · The Saudi money laundry and the president's uncle · The sentence of Enron's John Forney · The holiness of Neil Bush's marriage · The Silence of Cheney: a poem · South Park Christians · Capitalist against Bush: Warren Buffett · Fastow childen vs. Enron children · Give your prescription money to your old boss · Neil Bush, hard-working matchmaker · Republicans against fetuses and pregnant women · Emboldened Ken Lay · Faith-based jails · Please die for me so I can skip your funeral · A brief illustrated history of the Republican Party · Nancy Victory · Soldiers become accountants · Beware the Merrill Lynch mob · Darleen Druyun's $5.7 billion surprise · First responder funding · Hoovering the country · First Command fifty percent load · Ken Lay and the Atkins diet · Halliburton WMD · Leave no CEO behind · August in Crawford · Elaine Pagels · Profitable slave labor at Halliburton · Tom Hanks + Mujahideen · Sharon & Neilsie Bush · One weekend a month, or eternity · Is the US pumping Iraqi oil to Kuwait? · Cheney's war · Seth Glickenhaus: Capitalist against Bush · Martha's blow job · Mark Belnick: Tyco Catholic nut · Cheney's deferred Halliburton compensation · Jeb sucks sugar cane · Poindexter & LifeLog · American Family Association panic · Riley Bechtel and the crony economy · The Book of Sharon (Bush) · The Art of Enron · Plunder convention · Waiting in Kuwait: Jay Garner · What's an Army private worth? · Barbara Bodine, Queen of Baghdad · Sneaky bastards at Halliburton · Golf course and barbecue military strategy · Enron at large · Recent astroturf · Cracker Chic 2 · No business like war business · Big Brother · Martha Stewart vs. Thomas White · Roger Kimball, disappointed Republican poetry fan · Cheney, Lay, Afghanistan · Terry Lynn Barton, crimes of burning · Feasting at the Cheney trough · Who would Jesus indict? · Return of the Carlyle Group · Duct tape is for little people · GOP and bad medicine · Sears Tower vs Mt Rushmore · Scared Christians · Crooked playing field · John O'Neill: The man who knew · Back to the top






. . .